Thirty Days of Kink – Days 14 & 15

– Day Fourteen –

How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink?

Real life is much more casual and banter-y than the fantasy stuff. In fantasy kink, everyone is always perfect. They have perfect bodies, perfectly suave voices… they fit the fetish in your mind. In real life, people have flaws and personalities. They are clumsy and wonderful. I think working with the reality is more fun than keeping everything in the mind.

…. well, that was concise. Move on to day fifteen to make up for the days I missed? Sure.

– Day Fifteen –

Post a BDSM/kink activity you are curious about and would like to try.

Wow… these are questions that beg for short answers today. What is this, Twitter? I’m not used to writing stuff this short.

Anyway, I’d love to try pegging. For those not familiar with the term, pegging means a woman penetrating her partner’s anus with the use of a strap-on dildo. I think that it could be an interesting and very arousing experience for both parties, and I believe it might be a powerful form of Female Domination.

Uhm… See you tomorrow.

Have a sexy photo on me…

Source: http://agentlemistress.tumblr.com/post/146891515454
Source: http://agentlemistress.tumblr.com/post/146891515454

Thirty Days of Kink – Day 13

– Day Thirteen –

Explain as best you can what the appeal of kink/BDSM is to you. Why are you drawn to what you’re drawn to?

Uhm… because it’s my sexuality? I’m not sure I’d go so far as to call it my sexual orientation, but, for as long as I can remember, I’ve been into the kinky stuff. I was raised in Germany by a mother born in the 1960s. My mother never shut up about sex, even when I was a child.

I quickly became hyper-sexualised that way. I was curious about sex long before my peers in school and long before I had the hormones to make it a pleasant experience. Thanks to German late-night television and smutty magazines, I also quickly discovered the world of porn. And missionary was just… BORING!

So I looked at other things. I always enjoyed the feel of leather against skin. I’m a horseback rider, so I won’t deny having a preference for riding crops. It was little things like that that attracted me to BDSM in the first place. Also, the idea of being tied up and of con-non-con (consensual non-consent) just turned me on from the earliest moments…

But what draws me in the most is the look in the eyes of my play partner. When I make a handsome man like my husband beg me for things. When he begs to have me, when he begs me to come, breathless and enthralled by my sexual power over him, I get weak at the knees. (Not to mention soaking wet between my thighs!) This vulnerability and desire in a man just gets to me. Also, the inherent trust in a D/s relationship is something I love. And I’m just not that much of a fan of plain ol’ sex. Don’t get me wrong – I love PIV when I’m in the mood for it. But the mood has to strike me. I get very little out of it otherwise. I don’t even finger my vagina when I masturbate. I prefer to tease my clit instead. Penetration is something I have to desire for it to happen, but I can still get my rocks off in other ways.

And I think that that is the main appeal. Getting my kink on and being sexual without “laying back and thinking of England.” I love bringing the tease and playfulness to the table. I get turned on by ideas in my mind – I get turned on when I daydream about what I might do to my husband when I get home. The actual “traditional” definition of sex is overrated. The teasing is where all the fun lies.

Thirty Days of Kink – Day 5 –

– Day Five –

What was your first kinky sexual experience?

Okay, those of you who have followed thus far will remember that I mentioned cyber-sexing with total strangers I met on the Gaia online community forums as a teen. Well, I did that A LOT. One of the people I met that way even sent me images of him masturbating (my first dick picks before they became the bane of modern women!) after one of our cyber sessions. I remember a few choice details of our conversations that I related to my high school friends over lunch the next day. There was the part where he wrote “turn around, I’m going to fuck you like an animal!!!!” (yes, the exclamation points were his) that particularly stuck with me (I can still quote it from memory, so it must have). And then there was the “now swallow” line.

I remember that last one because one of my friends, lets call her “Free Spirit,” was particularly grossed out by that line when I recounted my session to her. I remember her telling me that she found the idea of swallowing cum utterly disgusting. And then she admitted to having also tried cybering once, but that she and a friend had chickened out when they had been asked to send a picture of their breasts. Not that it matters. We were teens, we were incredibly arrogant and believed we were the best… and we were gosh darned stupid.

When it comes to real-life kinky experiences though, my first experience was with my now subby-hubby (who needs a better nickname than this… seriously, what’s wrong with me?). He tied me up in a hog-tie with some rope. I remember finding it all incredibly erotic and getting turned on merely at the idea of being tied up. Continue reading