– Day Three –
How did you discover you were kinky?
Oh boy are we going down a rabbit hole today!
I do not recall the tender age at which I discovered I was kinky, but I am willing to stake my hand on the fact that I was pretty effing young. Let’s say I was eleven… that’s an okay sounding number, right? Harry Potter was that age when he got his Hogwarts letter, so I’ll run with it…
In any case, I was pretty curious about sex in my pre-teen years, and, while my family still had Windows ’98 and a crappy dial-up connection, I turned to pornography to satisfy my curiosity. This was due in part to my school giving absolutely no proper sex education, and also because I had no friends to discuss sex and sexuality with. So porn it was. Whenever I got caught (because my parents checked the history and whatnot), I would always blame my younger brother because “I [was] a girl! Girls don’t look at that stuff!” They would buy it hook, line and sinker.
I know, I know – I was terribly entrenched in the traditional gender roles at the time and I kind of hate myself for it nowadays. Moving on!
So, on those early Angelfire hosted porn sites (because, of course, I only had access to free porn), I found pictures of men and women tied up with ropes, women wearing tight leather and latex corsets, people wielding whips, etc. The more someone was being Dominated, the more intrigued I was. It was mesmerising and I was hooked.
I don’t think I’ve ever thought of sex in a non-kinky way since then. Even in my Vanilla days, I fantasised all the time about the BDSM Scene. I remember, in high school, still a total virgin and talking out of my arse about sex to seem like I knew things, I kept telling people that I loved tying up men. I remember telling to anyone who would listen that men were only worthwhile when in bed, and only if they were the bottom and a Lady was in control.
Of course, my views have shifted significantly since being an arrogant and pratty little fourteen-year-old. Among other things, I’ve shifted my views on men and on sex as a whole (usually comes with losing your V-card). However, the basic idea of Dominance and submission in the bedroom is still something I still relish about sex.
And don’t you go drilling my high school friends about how I was in high school. I fear they will confirm this account and tell you much, much worse stories about me still!